Yep, I am still feeling those sad vibes. I know some may not want to hear about my wallowing, so please don't feel the need to read. I just can't seem to escape this overwhelmed, tears everyday routine and really need to write to get things off my chest. I am ready to throw in the towel on this whole school thing. I have my Bachelors degree in Liberal Studies, but to teach in a public school that alone is not enough. So here I am student teaching (Mon-Friday), taking night classes, trying to keep my photography business a float, state tests galore, and on top of that trying to fight this inner battle of wanting a baby, also trying to be the wife my husband deserves and a good daughter to my heavenly father (which is my number one of course!). I just feel burnt out. Tired of the worry, tired of the tears, blah blah blah (okay, I'm done with my pity party now). I have all this overwhelming sadness , BUT God never fails to remind me of all that he has gone through for me! Today God reminded me in a way that was just perfect. Out of the mouth of one of my 2nd graders "Jesus died, so we could really live." (Such a genius little boy!). While doing seat work my students had a wonderful conversation about Jesus, and that was such an encouragement to me (children have so much to teach us, so be sure to take the time to listen). Jesus died for me, a sinner consumed by the world around me. If he could face a horrific death, the least I can do is not give up. I know each day is still going to be a struggle, and the sad feeling I feel will come and go, but one thing remains the same.....Jesus' love for me. How blessed I am! I pray that this sadness will be overtaken by the joy of that very fact...God loves me despite my imperfectness and sinful nature. That leaves me speechless...

 Yep, I am still feeling those sad vibes. I know some may not want to hear about my wallowing, so please don't feel the need to read. I just can't seem to escape this overwhelmed, tears everyday routine and really need to write to get things off my chest. I am ready to throw in the towel on this whole school thing. I have my Bachelors degree in Liberal Studies, but to teach in a public school that alone is not enough. So here I am student teaching (Mon-Friday), taking night classes, trying to keep my photography business a float, state tests galore, and on top of that trying to fight this inner battle of wanting a baby, also trying to be the wife my husband deserves and a good daughter to my heavenly father (which is my number one of course!). I just feel burnt out. Tired of the worry, tired of the tears, blah blah blah (okay, I'm done with my pity party now). I have all this overwhelming sadness , BUT God never fails to remind me of all that he has gone through for me! Today God reminded me in a way that was just perfect. Out of the mouth of one of my 2nd graders "Jesus died, so we could really live." (Such a genius little boy!). While doing seat work my students had a wonderful conversation about Jesus, and that was such an encouragement to me (children have so much to teach us, so be sure to take the time to listen). Jesus died for me, a sinner consumed by the world around me. If he could face a horrific death, the least I can do is not give up. I know each day is still going to be a struggle, and the sad feeling I feel will come and go, but one thing remains the same.....Jesus' love for me. How blessed I am! I pray that this sadness will be overtaken by the joy of that very fact...God loves me despite my imperfectness and sinful nature. That leaves me speechless...